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New research suggests that eating peanut butter could help reduce a woman's risk of developing breast cancer.
Teenage girls who eat peanut butter twice a week were found to reduce their risk of breast cancer by 39%.
Similarly, girls who ate peanut butter four times a week were found to reduce their risk of breast cancer by 78%, while girls who had a bath in a gallon of peanut butter each night reduced that likelihood by 87%. Based on this evidence, scientists have suggested that filling your bra with peanut butter each day could help cure breast cancer entirely.
"Of course," admitted one scientist, "you could just stop drinking alcohol, seeing as one unit a day increases your risk of developing breast cancer by 6%. That might help."
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